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29 Weekly Meeting
   
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All-Island Interact Quiz
 
Happening stories!
Just Listen to our Gallery

 
 
Pix of the Month
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Archives
  » District Governor commends "Uptown" for "outstanding work"
  » Uptown gets the “Nelson touch”
  » Another member for the ‘Uptown family’
  » Uptown organizes District Training Seminar
  » Uptowners get culinary tips at ‘Fireside’ meeting
  » Cricketer Sangakkara lights up Uptown meeting
  » ‘Raj’ installed as 22nd President of Uptown
  » Uthayapuram Tamil Vidyalaya rises from the ruins amidst festive atmosphere
     
 
Smile Awhile
 
Corporate Lesson 1
A man is getting into the shower just as his wife is finishing up her shower when the doorbell rings. The wife quickly wraps herself in a towel and runs downstairs. When she opens the door, there stands Bob, the next door neighbor. Before she says a word, Bob says, ”I’ll give you $800 to drop that towel.”

After thinking for a moment, the woman drops her towel and stands naked in front of Bob. After a few seconds, Bob hands her $800 dollars and leaves.

The woman wraps back up in the towel and goes back upstairs. When she gets to the bathroom, her husband asks, “Who was that?” “It was Bob the next door neighbor,” she replies. “Great!” the husband says, “Did he say anything about the $800 he owes me?”

Moral of the story:
- If you share critical information pertaining to credit and risk with your shareholders in time, you may be in a position to prevent avoidable exposure.



Corporate Lesson 2
A sales rep and a administration clerk, and the manager are walking to lunch when they find an antique oil lamp. They rub it and a Genie comes out. The Genie says, “I’ll give each of you just one wish.” “Me first! Me first!” says the admin. clerk. “I want to be in the Bahamas, driving a speedboat, without a care in the world.” Poof! She’s gone.

”Me next! Me next!” says the sales rep. “I want to be in Hawaii, relaxing on the beach with my personal masseuse, an endless supply of Pina Coladas and the love of my life.” Poof! He’s gone.

”OK, you’re up,” the Genie says to the manager. The manager says, “I want those two back in the office after lunch.”

Moral of the story: - Always let your boss have the first say.



Corporate Lesson 3
A crow was sitting on a tree, doing nothing all day. A rabbit asked him, “Can I also sit like you and do nothing all day long?” The crow answered: - “Sure, why not.” So, the rabbit sat on the ground below the crow, and rested. A fox jumped on the rabbit and ate it.

Moral of the story: - To be sitting and doing nothing, you must be sitting very high up.



Corporate Lesson 4
A turkey was chatting with a bull. “I would love to be able to get to the top of that tree,” sighed the turkey, but I haven’t got the energy.” “Well, why don’t you nibble on my droppings?” replied the bull.

”They’re packed with nutrients.” The turkey pecked at a lump of dung and found that it gave him enough strength to reach the lowest branch of the tree. The next day, after eating some more dung, he reached the second branch. Finally after a fourth night, there he was proudly perched at the top of the tree. Soon he was spotted by a farmer, who shot the turkey out of the tree.

Moral of the story: - Bullshit might get you to the top, but it won’t keep you there
 
 
Uthayapuram School
gets a new lease of life!
 
 
Seenigama project
 
 
Helping the orphans &
displaced children
 
Combatting Thalassaemia

What is Thalassaemia?
What will we do?
What YOU can do?
 
 
Colombo Uptown to assist in rebuilding of Tangalle Hospital
 
 
   
   
 
 
Join hands with us in our efforts.
We welcome contributions for any of our projects. We work in a spirit of total transparency & accountability

 
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